I know many people say thirties are the new twenties, and that starting a new decade is like the New Year: a world full of possibilities that opens up before a hopefully-wiser-you, but I’ll be honest with you, guys, I am not exactly thrilled about saying good-bye to my twenties…
For some reason, I can’t help but feel a bit reluctant towards this particular number. I guess what puts me off the most is reaching this oh so crucial new stage in my life and realising that the way I pictured this moment 10 years ago doesn’t correspond at all with my current reality, no matter how many Instagram filters I put on it.
So today I look back on my twenties with certain wistfulness of the plans that never came to be, the trips that were never made, the books that were never read, the people who was never met… and yet, I like to think that if I had a second chance, I would make all the same choices, as every decision ever made and every experience ever had actually shaped the current human I am now. Sure, there is still a lot of work to do, but I have also come to appreciate and love who I am, and that is something to be a little proud of, I reckon!
But you’ve read the title about this never-seen-before-post-theme, right? 🙂 In my three decades of existence, I might’ve learned a thing or two that have undoubtedly contributed to a happier, fuller life, so I hope you find them interesting and inspiring one way or another!
1. Life is too short to worry about what other people think of you – you are not a jar of Nutella, you cannot please everybody, so stop trying and start liking yourself first of all.
2. Failure is a social concept – there is a metaphor about a baby taking his first steps and falling over and over. With no concept of what failure means in his head, he simply keeps on trying, lasting a bit longer each time he stands, until he is able to walk forwards. We should be that baby, brushing off the dirt after falling and stepping with even more confidence after rising, because it’s only a matter of time and persistence to get there.
3. Speak to yourself as you would to your best friend – why it’s always easier to be kinder to other people than to ourselves?
4. Music has therapeutic power – I have always believed it is a universal language, find some that speaks right to your soul and cancels all the background noise.
5. Active listening is a rare skill – easier said than done, but we should all learn to listen to what others really have to say instead of getting lost in the sea of our own preconceptions and judgements.
6. Life doesn’t care for your plans, so make them, but learn to adjust to them when they shift like a good sailor adjusts the sails when the wind changes.
7. Buy flowers more often. Flowers make you happy.
8. Work hard on your passion and value yourself highly. Nobody else will otherwise.
9. Good things take time. If you intend to reach all your goals in no time, you are in for a big disappointment. Be patient, my friend, and keep working hard. Worry not, people will notice!
10. Don’t take others for granted, relationships are like plants that need to be watered in order to live and grow.
11. The fact that you can eat two adult portions for lunch doesn’t mean you should (every single time).
12. Value the people who genuinely make you laugh. Laughter is the best remedy for most things in life. For anything else, you have chocolate.
13. It’s OK not to be OK, we all have down times. Call your mum, have a cry, watch your favourite series and eat pizza. Tomorrow will be a brand new beginning.
14. The love for material things is usually a fling, but human connections are the real deal.
15. You are not alone – whatever you are feeling today, chances are there is someone close to you that is going or has gone through something similar. It has never been easier to reach out to your community, so if you need a listening ear or a comforting shoulder, don’t be afraid to say so.
16. Never stop learning – personal growth is something you have to put energy and time into, but it will take you deeper on the inside and further on the outside.
17. Asking for help doesn’t mean you are weak or vulnerable, it means you can’t/won’t do it on your own and trust in others’ ability and generosity to help you grow and succeed.
18. Some things that are free but very valuable: kindness, empathy, laughter.
19. Don’t hold on to your luggage. It’s important to let some things go so that new things can take their place.
20. Travel as much as you can, as often as you can. Roots are for plants.
21. Confident people are able to laugh at themselves and take criticism.
22. Don’t compare yourself to others, but rather ask yourself: am I a better me than I was yesterday? If the answer is “no”, you know where to start.
23. Communication is the basis of social relationships. People are not mind-readers so tell them how you feel about them, good or bad, and work things out when needed.
24. Don’t settle for anything that doesn’t make you happy – you hold the steering wheel of your life and it’s never too late to change the things that are not fulfilling you.
25. Give your time to the people who deserve it and appreciate you for who you are.
26. Putting yourself first and taking care of your needs is not selfish, is the first step to love others in a healthy way.
27. Don’t be afraid of rejection, it’s the card you are always dealt with, but if you don’t ask for more cards you will never know if the next one on the deck is a winning ace.
28. Never underestimate the power of: a sincere compliment, a hug, a bit of mascara.
29. Stop being such a perfectionist. You are wasting precious time in things that are not even that important, but rather try to focus on the bigger picture.
30. Thirty is just a number, it doesn’t define you, so make this new ride around the sun one to remember!
Now, my official birthday is not until Tuesday. I’ve got the day off, guess will start the day up with pancakes for breakfast with my love and the rest… the rest is yet to be discovered!
Peace & Love
Varuna jithesh29th January 2018 at 2:10 pm
Perfect and nice looking outfit..
Steal4Style21st September 2017 at 6:33 pm
Me perdí tu cumple, así que felicidades atrasadas!! Me ha fascinado leer este post. Me has hecho reír y sonreír, sobre todo porque me he sentido muy identificada con varias. Hay cosas que también añado a mi lista de cosas aprendidas. Y otras las pongo en pendientes, porque aunque sepa que las tengo que aprender no me entran jajaja. Un saludo enorme!! Gracias por escribir tan bien!
Saida1st October 2017 at 11:28 am
oohhh mil gracias por leerme y por estar ahí con tu ánimo y tus comentarios. De verdad que son la razón por la que me encanta formar parte de la comunidad de bloggers! Un abrazote
Melina13th September 2017 at 2:46 pm
happy belated birthday! I know what you mean, its super weird to turn 30, but hey, life goes on and we can be happy to be healthy and alive 😀 i love your look by the way <3
Saida14th September 2017 at 9:32 pm
Thank you so much sweet Melina, I totally agree with you, it’s a time to reflect a bit, but then life goes on and I can only hope that it will be even better than it’s been so far 🙂
Tales of Two9th September 2017 at 9:41 am
Happy birthday! What a positive post! ‘Buy more flowers’ – couldn’t agree more! x
Saida1st October 2017 at 11:43 am
Yes, I only started buying flowers last year, but I am growing my collection of plants for a more long-lasting feeling 😉 thanks for stopping by, lovely
Jessica9th September 2017 at 5:06 am
Couldnt agree more with your list, especially on #6. Indeed, the world doesnt owe us anything, it’s up to us to work for our dreams! And a huge yes for #7!
Jessica | notjessfashion.com
Saida1st October 2017 at 12:39 pm
Definitely, Jessica. Things happen to the people who hustle and we can achieve everything we set our mind to, but nobody is going to pave the road before us! Thanks for reading week after week, dearest ♥
Sophie8th September 2017 at 2:08 pm
What a wonderful post – it’s the first one of yours I’ve read and I’ll be having a binge read now! The thing about the baby having no concept of failure really hit me because I struggle with the idea of failing a lot. One thing I don’t fail at though is eating two adult portions for lunch (oops) – must stop that (or at least do it less!). Gorgeous photos too, I love the neck scarf. Hope you had a lovely birthday xxx
Sophie | Sophar So Good
Saida1st October 2017 at 12:08 pm
Hi Sophie, so glad you visited my little corner and enjoyed this read. We perfectionists have a bit of an issue with failure, but I am also working on it as nobody really cares that much about our so called “failures” as we do, so let’s try and be nicer to ourselves 🙂
Shannon8th September 2017 at 6:01 am
Happy 30th Birthday! I hope you have an amazing time during these years! I really loved reading this. In fact, it’s probably my favourite blog post I’ve read all year. You definitely do have some wisdom that comes with age & I wish I had read these earlier. Particularly 11 haha Thanks for sharing & have a wonderful year!
TFM Life & Style blog
Saida1st October 2017 at 12:05 pm
You are so kind Shannon, thanks for a sweet comment and for being here week after week. I will try to make the best of the new decade 🙂
Ashley7th September 2017 at 5:36 pm
This is such a great post, babe. Happy 30th! Your 30s are super fun, so enjoy ’em. And your life lessons are SO on point- especially the bit about not being a jar of Nutella. 😉
Le Stylo Rouge
violettedaily6th September 2017 at 9:52 pm
Happy belated birthday Saida! I loved this post! I’m turning 25 this Friday and I’m excited and at the same time scared because I feel like I’m going to the next level! Hahah anyway! I’m happy to see you are even more beautiful and so happy!
Gil Zetbase6th September 2017 at 8:23 pm
So stylish look!
Have a nice evening!
Andreea Bîrsan6th September 2017 at 7:24 pm
First of all, happy birthday! If it counts, I would never guess your age, you look a lot younger. As for the lessons you’ve learnt, I need to agree with all of them, specially with buying flowers and traveling as much as we can. Wishing you a great day. xx
Stella6th September 2017 at 4:34 pm
Belated yet most sincere happy birthday my sweetheart Saida! Welcome to my decade! It’s the best one, you will see. I love reading your thoughts and I hope these feelings of 30s frustration will go away. You look fabulous, you are an amazing person and you are entering the most adventurous decade in your life. Sometimes we are not in the point where we imagined we would be, but that moment will come so relax and enjoy the journey 🙂
Sending much love your way!
Maria | Short Girl Long Jacket6th September 2017 at 12:33 am
Happy birthday Saida!! This was a good read. I’m turning 25 next month and I’m also having similar feelings (maybe not as intense, but still it’s a quarter of a century). Maybe your 30s will be even better than your 20s because you’ve learned all these things and you can take it easier on yourself 🙂
Mode Femme Blog5th September 2017 at 7:48 pm
happy birthday my dear! I love your blog, i think all the lesson apply for each age 🙂
Nistha Saraf5th September 2017 at 8:12 am
I loved reading this blog, so true and helpful
Have a great great birthday❤️
yuka5th September 2017 at 3:42 am
Happy birthday! You are wise beyond your years!! These are all such great tips!
The Fashion Folks4th September 2017 at 5:46 pm
Love this post babe! So many wise thoughts and reflections. Love to ignore the social concept of failure and just go for it anyways. Also the power of giving simple compliments. It’s key. Have a lovely week hun and happy birthday! Xx
Anja4th September 2017 at 4:57 pm
Beautifully written!!!! I love #12 in particular and was wondering why I had so much chocolate in NI while laughing with you almost every single day 🙂 Have an amazing birthday tomorrow
Saida1st October 2017 at 11:40 am
Ahahaha, yes, babe, fun times are always remembered and above all because of the people you spend them with. Love you!!
Koral4th September 2017 at 4:18 pm
Te quiero tanto, tantísimo que cada vez se me hace más difícil tenerte lejos y perderme días tan especiales como tu 30 cumpleaños, pero sobre todo perderme cada uno de los 364 días restantes del año 🙁 te quiero, princesita!!! Te veo prontito
didieryhc4th September 2017 at 6:23 am
First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
I am turning 29 this year and I am fast approaching on that 3.0 number but I am not that worried. Remember that age is merely a number! Plus you look amazing!
Saida1st October 2017 at 11:35 am
I try to remember that, Didier and you know what? After all the anticipation and the celebrations, I don’t feel any different, if anything, just feeling like adding more things on my bucket list, hahhaa. Big hugs, my dear
brazilianflare4th September 2017 at 2:44 am
I loved this. Very motivating, and so true. Was a good read to start my week.
Saida1st October 2017 at 11:33 am
Thank you lovely Maria!
MM3rd September 2017 at 1:50 pm
Jaja no sé porque se ha cambiado…mares es seas…jaja
MM3rd September 2017 at 1:48 pm
Mi preciosa niña (siempre serás mi niña) maravilloso post..ya sabes que mi deseo para ti es que seas Feliz cada año, cada mes, cada semana, cada día, cada hora, cada minuto, cada segundo, cada nanosegundo…….TQ
Ian3rd September 2017 at 11:19 am
Wow, fantastic post! Love the photos too. It’ll be my turn to hit those digits 6 days after you! Bring it on – around the sun we go! 😀
Saida1st October 2017 at 10:51 am
Thanks so much my dearest friend, I am sure you had a fab time over there! Sending big hugs